Drive by Profiling (pt 2) – WJI

We continue our squibby profiles of the populace:

Jonathan  delivers wisdom, literary vibes, and beardedness to our regiment. His calm, settled confidence, and delivery of lady bug sagas are so desperately needed. Expect to find Jonathan’s name emblazoned across a cover at a bookstore near you and/or Amazon in the future. You might want to check under “J. Boss” too so you’re sure you don’t miss it.

Jonathan and Chelsea’s creative/fiction/storyness gave me comfort and reference points. If that makes sense… It doesn’t. Just accept it as truth.

Abby provides motherly auras while speaking in encouraging tones, shepherding us to the car, and driving us to school. She sits serene as a swan in the epicenter of stress. She makes sure we don’t get lost in the parking lot before driving home. Then she cooks us homemade meals (well, once she did and she didn’t give me any).

She’ll be staying here learning more from WORLD and then interning like a boss in DC.

I have adopted her car. We’re calling it Abigail. It has the carnage of my bracelet strewn permanently in the back seat.

Leaning back in his chair, arms crossed, Kirkland practiced his future editor reserve during peer reviews. His hair aspires to great heights, as will his career after an internship where he will be sitting at a computer for 40 hrs a week, styling his hair, and also working…. He needs to buy an editor cap before the fall when he takes over the Wheaton Record. The Record should prosper and writers should suffer as Kirkland drives them to keep up with his work ethic.

He also has a cool watch.

Kaylen’s haircut fills me with everlasting Portland hominess as she readily engages on topics such as sociological philosophy and….drumroll…the finer points of Dietrich Bonhoeffer’s theology.

She graduated from Wheaton, packed her bags, and took a pilgrimage to Asheville without home or daily bread. In the last two weeks, she has arranged a place to stay and ride to Washington, DC where she will excel at her internship at Al Jazeera. It’s a good place to start before she brings world peace to the Middle East….

I would gladly spend some more 80 degree evenings marching up North Carolina hills, weighed down with backpacks and sleep-deprived-under eye bags, talking of the dynamics of group identity and unhomed/misfitness of those who’ve been mashed into multiple cultures.

But maybe next time we meet we will be will be in Transylvania…ahem, my bad. That would be Tanzania where Kaylen grew up saving orphans. For realz.

Tomorrow we shall raise the parting glass.

*Jae Wasson contributed to this article.


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