signs of life (and Harrison’s debut)

Went to Alaska.

did not get eaten by bears, but narrowly escaped certain death from ptarmigans.

snowshoed with my bf. Oh, the humiliations.

snow machined to a frozen lake.

it was nice.

did not fall through the ice.

that was also nice.

did not meet these aliens that seem to be coming to earth in this photo.

many of the best conversation of my life have involved SEMKI.

cracked my head on the ice. Then saw this beautiful sunset (other people saw it too).

then watched “Rambo” and ate salmon.

Harrison’s first glimpse of these Pacific shores.

then had so many delays and airline misery coming home I made more money in vouchers than I do in a week a work. And my mom bought me a stuffed animal at the airport…

and we went straight to the beach (did not pass Go, did not collect $200).

and drove home on one of the paths of old.

and I knew that the Willamette Valley is the most beautiful place on earth.

and that spring was almost gone already.

and some of my favorite trees had died. #oldmarleyatthelodgeisdead

and so…

i drank a lot of green tea to cope. lol. xP

and everything went into quarantine, including Harrison, in a new attempt/idea about our illnesses.

and then somehow we ended up at the beach again. #classic

with all 12 (two hiding still) nieces and nephews.

and lots of sunshine and chocolate.

and then I came back to my meth house.

this one time, I scheduled my eye exam at the wrong clinic and so mostly went Costco/New Seasons shopping. And so this is Harrison sitting on my coming nephew.

and this is camels (aka tulips, aka you should watch Brothers Bloom more often).

this is what I ate in celebration of a 65 hour lunch-breakless, running on your feet work week completed, because of my-brother-in-arms got me raisin snacks at Dollar Tree. And all people know that raisin snacks, at least in the days of childhood, are the measure of ones standing in the world.

and now I am sitting here drinking chocolate, thinking about all the beautiful things in life, and how everything will leave you (including your dog that has cancer) and that all homes are either taken away from you or spit you out. And how it’s nearly impossible to make decisions, let alone know what you want.

And so… I really need Jesus. And that’s probably a fine place to be.

It’s one thing to know. It’s another to act on the knowing. It’s another to feel. But joy and thankfulness are not outside of our control, and…when it comes down to it…life is beautiful and mine is Jesus’ and it is good. And I have everything. More than I could have imagined.

But I need to stop having so many feelings so this blog isn’t such a loser. Call myself a writer… Blughadug.